http://birthnexus.blogspot.com/ is my next adventure...please take a peek
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Instant sisters...just add birth and mix
It has been quiet here, in my blog but I would like to pose this question to the lovely human beings who read here. I would love to hear your responses.
I have been thinking quietly about the profound loss of so many things in our femininity, our connections to other women mainly, mirroring our connections to the devine feminine. I think of how as women we have so few things that link us together and how we can be so suspicious of each others motivations. It is difficult to trust one another at times because we have been so wounded by our culture (wether it is family culture or the culture that surrounds it)
I see it everyday, this guarding and unguarding that we do...the subtle dance of friendship, the subtle rules and rule breaking. Alliances forming, cliques forming then breaking apart.
It is interesting and painful to be a part of. We are such strong women at MLL, you can imagine how things could get difficult in such an intimate space with so much brillance and insecurity at the same time.
I have had some recent interactions with a fellow student that have brought me to place where I wondered if I had grown up, or if I was still stuck in the trauma of being an adolescent girl. It brough me to a time in my life where being "in" was so much more important than being myself. It was/is not pleasant reliving that.
I am in the constant process of healing and moving through painful things, like the birth learning process, the social process learning curve is just as steep here.
I haven't had sisters, I grew up with 5 older brothers. I have instant sisters now, for good or bad. Someone help me understand this whole thing. I am at a bit of a loss right now on how to move through it.
I am serious, share with me your understandings on how this all works...I should have the answers but I don't.
It is a silly plea I know....HELP!